Its not “rocket science”…It begins with these two words…”I DO”!

Today the Universal Church celebrates the Feast of the Holy Family of Jesus, Mary and Joseph…..These three were the first Church and the family to this day is what is referred to as the Domestic Church…..Its in the family that we are formed, whether we become a neurosurgeon or a truck driver…We all come from a family…This is why its vital that society strives to safeguard family life….St Paul tells us in the second reading from Mass today…..”Brothers and sisters: Put on, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, heartfelt compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience, bearing with one another and forgiving one another, if one has a grievance against another; as the Lord has forgiven you, so must you also do. And over all these put on love, that is, the bond of perfection. And let the peace of Christ control your hearts”……Words are very easy to say…Just like the words we repeat when we get married….”I DO”……The question is….How do we put these words into action?…..The answer can be summed up in one word - GRACE……Our society disregards grace….We either think its something “made up”…..Or we are too overly confident in ourselves, thinking we do not need it…..Let me take this time to remind you….WE ALL NEED GOD’s GRACE…..And because God loves us - He gives it to us…..But in order to receive God’s grace, we must open our hearts and bend our will to receive it - Its not an “automatic”……This is why marriage is a Sacrament - Its not just a “piece of paper”…..To do all the things that St Paul notes today at Mass - We need God’s grace…..This is one of the fatal mistakes of my generation….We have shown God the door and God is a gentleman, he never forces himself upon us….But when we show God the door, things fall apart….Its time to invite God back into our lives and into our marriages

“Open our hearts, O Lord, to listen to the words of your Son”

What keeps us from structuring our marriages according to the precepts of the Catholic Church?………The answer - We think what the Church teaches about marriage is outdated and cannot be done……If we step back from that mindset and think objectively - Two thousand years of wisdom can be founded in what the Church teaches and if you want real life examples they are also there for you as well…..I remember when one of my childhood friends was getting married…His mother was talking about what a “real marriage” was all about…..She had four children and her first husband died…She then got remarried to a man who accept her four children as his own and then they had another child together…..That my friends is a marriage grounded on “solid rock” - You can’t “fake” that - It speaks for itself…..Such a marriage is a witness to the world…These people I am talking about were not rich by the way…Nor where they super educated…They did however ground their lives in something much larger then themselves……God’s grace can not be “self manufactured”….We have to make ourselves available to it….My generation “thinks” in its hubris that they do not need God…I got news for you - That was and is a BAD decision and the statistics prove it…..I look at my own family….My parents, my grandparents, my aunts and uncles…They were not educated, and some of them had hard lives…Yet they were married for decades…They raised children who became productive members of society….How did they do it?……They understood what marriage really was all about….Its not a “piece of paper”…..….Today I read the story about a saint….St Gianna Beretta, a lay woman who married Pietro Molla around 80 years ago….They had four children together…During the birth of their fourth child doctors said that Gianna’s life was at risk and that the child needed to be aborted. Gianna refused and the child was born healthy but she died giving birth….Pietro was left to raise four children alone, which he did…That fourth child, which could have been aborted went on to become a medical doctor…..Do you think that story could have happened without the grace of God?…..Do you think Pietro could have raised four children without a wife and without the grace of God?……No matter who we are, life is going to throw everything and “the kitchen sink” at you…..God made marriage to be a Sacrament….To look at it any other way is a huge mistake….And when we view marriage through the eyes of God, we love our spouses more and more each day…I can speak for myself…My wife has given birth to five children and has sacrificed infinitely for both me and our children…I can say with honesty…I love her more today then the day we were married…God has blessed us not because we are “special”…But because we gave God permission to “bless us”…God is the one who is “special”!

“Those who keep his commandments remain in him, and he in them, and the way we know that he remains in us is from the Spirit he gave us”

Today Holy Mother Church reminds us that every family is meant to be like the Holy Family…..Many will read this and say - Can’t be done!….Well, I am here to tell you it can be done!….Its as my own mother would say to me all the time - “Joe - Its a choice”…We must make a choice and commit to God and give him permission to work in our life and in our marriage…….When St Paul was complaining about a “thorn in his side” - In prayer this is what he heard….“My grace is sufficient for you, for power is made perfect in weakness. I will rather boast most gladly of my weaknesses, in order that the power of Christ may dwell with me”……This “power” is available to all of us!…..But we have to give God permission and if we do, God will give us this “power”…..It’s not “rocket science”…It begins with these two words…”I DO”!